Sunday, November 22, 2009

i really hate it when people make judgement on my relationship with him. you can ask me question, but don't u ever judge. don't u ever question me why this why that. and worse, tell me what to do, how to live my life.because you don't know me. you don't know what i want.

Thursday, November 19, 2009

i think i really want it to happen but maybe not tomorrow.. but i want it to happen sometime soon that's for sure..but i want time to think abt it too. After everything else i've seen, it got me thinking and i'm not so sure anymore.. is this really what i want?

Friday, November 6, 2009

Did a test and some reflections. This is useful to think about how to improve our relationship and not letting it go down the slope further just because of long distance. I know many people are afraid to be as honest as possible with themselves beause the heart always rule the head. So while doing the test, I am glad that I am extremely honest to myself. Though the result is quite disappointing, but that does not mean it is a unhealthy relationship - it just means more effort is needed to improve it. I guess the main problem in our relationship is communication. When initial attraction is present, quite often the glass is half full. But when initial attraction leaves, that same "glass" becomes half empty. I have considered some of these questions from some marriage counselling website which I've forgotten the link! Y for YES /N for No


1. Are you having an affair? N

2. Is your partner having an affair (or do you think so)? N

3. Has your sex life been disappointing? (For example, you are no longer sexually attracted to your partner.) N

4. Are you unable to communicate about important issues or areas of your relationship? Y

5. Is there physical or emotional abuse? N

6. Is there an unusually thorny issue or ongoing problem (that you have been unable to resolve) that seems to be poisoning or undermining your total relationship or aspects of your relationship unrelated to that problem? Y

7. Are either or both of you excessively or obsessively jealous? N

8. Have you lost trust for your partner? N

9. Have you lost respect for your partner? N

10. Has your relationship ceased to be a source of fun for you? N

11. Does your partner seem chronically unhappy with you in a way that you cannot satisfy him or her? Y

12. Is there too much dependency or smothering in your relationship? N

13. Are there too many rules (that don't work for you) that you need to live by in order to make your relationship work? Not sure

14. Do you experience your partner as rejecting you no matter what you do? Y

15. Did you have thoughts of calling it off the day of or the day before your wedding? N

16. Have you and your partner lost the ability to work out conflict? Y

17. Have you and your partner been unable to adjust to a major change in your lives? Not sure

18. Is your partner insisting on a lifestyle change that is totally unacceptable to you? Not sure

19. Is this relationship incompatible with pursuing what you see as your life purpose or next steps toward that purpose? Not sure

20. Have you simply stopped growing together? N

21. Is there a drug or alcohol problem that looms over your relationship -- mild to severe? N

Well.. well.. sometimes it still take 2 hands to clap though.....